Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
