is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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