remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
