piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
