In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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