I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
