Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
