Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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