Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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