ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
