I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I have fence marks all over my body
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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