Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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