Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
