It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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