i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
