Don't make out with my wife yet
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
