haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
