Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
