she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
