I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
