Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
