i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Randomize
