Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
