dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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