You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
