Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
