we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Farmville is her only friend.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
