im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
