So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
