Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
