they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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