Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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