It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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