I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize