when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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