Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
