Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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