When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
