GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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