ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
