I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
