O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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