Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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