I heard we made out
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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