Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
cat food counts as protein by the way
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
