ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
