her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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