I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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