If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
