we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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